Your body keeps the score, but so does the scoreboard (reflection on mental health and sports)- Rob Phillips (CEO of ABOVE)

I have become a recent enthusiast of Girls high school Junior Varsity Basketball, and no I'm not "that guy" I am watching our 12 year old Dakota play. A 6th grader on a High school team is a massive accomplishment, and the family is in for this and super supportive. She has always had athletic ability far beyond what would be typical for her age. I know basketball, and I could see how fast she dribbled, her superior footwork, and obvious fan club. She has ability for basketball excellence if she so desires. We are sitting at a recent game and Dakota goes down with an obvious ankle injury, and my thoughts take an interesting turn. I sat there thinking watching our favorite athlete with her first injury, "Don't limp you will look weak", "don't let them help you off, walk off on your own", "get tape and get back out there", "I have done this 1,000 times it isn't that bad", "Taking ice keeps you out of the game", take time behind the bench walk it off and test its strength so you can get back in" , and "Don't elevate it, this means you won't play". I grounded myself eventually remembering this is a 12 year old with at least 10 years of basketball ahead of her. This isn't her problem this is my problem, well our problem I glance at Vanessa and realize she is fighting away the same thoughts that I am. We step back and take some moments to reflect on our attitudes, and how we can raise a well rounded athlete that prioritizes impressive physical achievement, good mental health, with positive self reflection. Is this a generational thing ? I certainly never recall a coach on any level worrying about my "feelings" about my day or why I made a mistake in a game. It is true as a family we value physical and mental toughness, and this fact is no secret at home. We emphasize resilience because we know the consequences when you don't have it. These are things that are important, but in a evolving atmosphere of mental health and sports the question of how prioritize mental health while encouraging excellence to an injured 12 year athlete becomes exceptionally complex. 

In the last 5 years there has been a recognition of the impact of mental health in athletic's. People pay attention when athletes pull out of olympic events for mental health reasons, First round draft pics for the NBA seemingly forget how to shoot, and great drivers retire early from auto racing. The mental health aspect of performance is a real thing, and when it fails us we fail too , just like our body fails us with a sprained ankle or torn ACL. I remember being an athlete in college, and I can tell you one of the biggest indicators of good performance was my ability to manage anxiety during the game. I see Dakota make the same errors I did in games when I was anxious, and I know when she is just thinking about playing, instead of worrying about making a mistake she does well. The idea of engaging in a sport against other people with something at stake is what makes sports rewarding, sports also develop character, accountability, leadership, and resilience so we don't want to give up all these opportunities just to improve mental health and give everyone a trophy. We can't do that! competition is fun, overcoming personal struggles is good, and building character and resilience through hardship is essential. 

None of us have an easy answer here, and I know we aren't the only parents of a talented athlete who worry about it. Our worries are small one's compared to the big picture of high level athletes we love to cheer on today. The pressure for some people is a chance at a better life for their whole family. maintain a college scholarship they desperately need to afford it, or one kick that wins the super bowl! I don't have any amazing groundbreaking insight but here is a start. We need to push a dialogue of positive mental health across all sports fostering sound mind , and mental preparation. We can imagine that when a coach ask us "are we good to play" he is talking about "all of us" not just our sprained ankle.