Marriage Hot Topic- Vanessa Phillips

Let’s get hot and heavy here, y’all. Let’s talk about SEX in marriage! Uh oh, did I get you all excited for nothing? Did you said ooooh then say oh..?

Well that is NOT how it should be! Sex in marriage SHOULD be HOT and heavy!

We seem to have this narrative that sex goes away in a long term relationship. It is a social norm and most people and couples choose this way.

The real deal is, sex with your life partner should be BETTER as time passes. It should be frequent, adventurous, connected and wanted. People are wired to want sex, Men AND Women. A lot of couples choose not to communicate their needs and wants. They do not feel comfortable in front of their partner. They don’t like their body, they get embarrassed about sex, or they just refrain from it as time passes. Being uptight, refusing to have sex or using sex as a way to get things from your partner, isn’t what it’s about. No one can have these behaviors and act surprised when their partner cheats.

A true healthy relationship and marriage, is letting go of your embarrassment regarding sex, communicating what you think is sexy or a turn on, working on yourself to become the version of you your partner wants.

The thought of not having sex with your spouse, or not liking sex with your spouse, and then cheating and having wild and sexy sex, is NOT the way it’s supposed to go!!! One of the points of marriage is that you have someone you trust to spend and give your life with and to. So, don’t treat them as a friend, or a resource. Ladies, loosen up, who cares if they didn’t clean up their dishes, ask them what is sexy to them, buy that sexy dress, wear that small bikini, go on vacation or a date night, and go for it! Guys, tell her what you want, give her what she likes, make her feel comfortable letting go and act like a man! Do things you always wanted to, and your relationship will grow and get better!