Aging Gracefully or Disgracefully Aging? - by Vanessa Phillips (Lead Trainer for ABOVE)

"Don’t rub your eyes, they’ll wrinkle.” “Don’t wear your hair tight, you’ll stretch your forehead and your hair will fall out.” These are the things our mothers and grandmothers would tell us at the young age of 12. Little did we know by our mid to late 30’s we would be pulling at our faces in the mirror, lifting our skin with our fingers, spending thousands of dollars a year on products, watching every trend to keep up looking younger. However, little did our mothers, grandmothers and the rest of us know that we would turn from OLAY lift cream to false eyelashes, Botox, boob jobs, butt lifts and more… our women have spent MORE money on procedures and surgeries than all of us together on products. My opinions are about to get super real and they are mine, so if you want to get angry, keep reading and if you think you might agree with me, keep reading. I’m sure any of you can look at my face and tell me what I should get done and that’s ok too! I’m not perfect, at all, I am just venting a personal opinion.

What are we doing to our faces and bodies? We look like straight up clowns, literally and figuratively! The false eyelashes look like broom bristles coming off of our eyes and look unnatural and silly. The Botox starting at 28 years of age makes us already look older than we are, look droopy when we can’t afford our next dose, and runs the risk of severe side effects causing facial paralysis. The injected lips that we all like to fib about are a cause of ridicule when people see us and if we think we’re hiding it we are just silly…like I didn’t ever think getting stung by a bee or having an allergic reaction was sexy. My bad. The two giant double DD’s sitting on our tiny chests that are meant to hold B’s, just look painful and have legitimate data stating they cause inflammation and autoimmune disorders (read Are Your Fake Boobs Making You Sick by Jen Herrera). IF YOU HAD BREAST CANCER, ROCK ON GIRL WEAR YOUR NEW BOOBS PROUDLY AND I SALUTE YOU!! Our BBL and butt implants (for the ones I can REALLY tell) look like someone put fix-a-flat in our butt and makes it look like our butt starts in our lower butt and we are all staring at it, not because it’s hot but because we are trying to figure out how we sit. (For the ones I can’t tell, good for you!!)

LADIES: What are we teaching our girls? We are teaching our girls and future women the wrong message. How can we look at young ladies and our daughters and students and mentees and say “love yourself and be happy with who you are” or the infamous “this is how God made you” or “it counts what’s on the inside” but we ourselves are becoming unrecognizable because we are so afraid to LOOK 40 or 50?!? Our girls are going to think they are less than if their boobs aren’t huge rock solid softballs on their chest and their butts aren’t lifted up over their back. How about - keep nice skin, a little foundation and lip gloss? Maybe go to the gym, play a sport, draw, paint, write? Why can’t we teach regular female gender roles with some femininity, brains, talent and to be a kind person? I, personally, have gray hair that I color, I wear a little make up over my age spotted/wrinkled face, I like to dress up when it’s time and feel good in what I wear. I chose to start going to the gym and lifting heavy weight so that I could get in kick ass shape and feel good about myself and send my daughter the message of FEELING good and LOOKING good without injections, surgery, procedures and falsies. HEALTH is beautiful. Personality matters. I’m not talking about that old offensive adage of “she’s overweight but her face is pretty and her personality is great.” I’m talking about teaching our girls and young women health, wellness, skincare, being put together, being friendly and fun and smart…that’s beauty. We have a lot of repair work to do out there with females in the new and upcoming generations. Maybe if we start now we can get it right for the newbies.